Kim Jong-il advises North Korean soccer team via invisible phone

Perhaps this would explain the North Korean squad’s 0-7 loss to Portugal:

North Korean leader Kim Jong-il “gives regular tactical advice during matches using mobile phones that are not visible to the naked eye,” the team’s manager Kim Jong-hun told ESPN Thursday. The coach dutifully told the sports channel that Kim Jong-il developed the James-Bond technology himself.

It appears that the Dear Leader is no better at coaching soccer than he is at running an economy.

It appears that North Korea decided to broadcast the game with Portugal live: Bad timing.